Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I forgot how hot balto sounded
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Randomize
