So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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