Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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