Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
don't judge my taste in strippers
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
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