Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
