is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
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