Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I'm having to shit out rocks
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize