no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize