My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
