wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
