I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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