Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
