I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
