what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
