official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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