so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
