do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
