I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Randomize
