Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
