Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
try to milk me bitch
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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