I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
A+ Viking dick
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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