hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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