Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Randomize
