How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
