Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
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