Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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