sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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