have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Randomize
