When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I cut my penus on the lid.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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