dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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