So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
high people should be assigned attendants
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Randomize
