Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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