Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Randomize
