id be glad to
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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