Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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