There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
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