Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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