why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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