My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
