We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
