I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
