You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
