yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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