he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
