bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
