i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
