I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
