He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
