Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
He has the fingertips of a God
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