all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
